The Seven Deadly Mistakes to Avoid When Dating a Dutch Man
Since the dawn of time, man has risked life and limb to hunt down its prey. And even harder, the Dutch dating game. The things I dating etiquette in the netherlands for my readers. Every man is different, so of course I will have to generalise. The tips I will provide are just ways of helping to at least get as far as a good conversation, or better still the things that expat women should not say to Dutch men.
Religion To get anywhere with a Dutch man you have to be able to understand, respect and tolerate their primary religion which is money. Dutch men dating sites mobile al money above just about anything else. This is considered by many Dutch men to be the height of chic and elegance. Indeed, I suggest to compliment him on his bold and daring use of primary colors and try not to stare at them for the rest of the evening.
Due to their love of money, you should not be insulted if at the end of a delightful evening at some nondescript brown cafe, when your date goes through the bill with the of an American customs agent checking baggage for the presence of illegal substances. When he presents you with your portion of the bill, smile gracefully and pay your share as if this is the most normal thing in the world.
Common mistakes dating etiquette in the netherlands by Expat women when hunting their Dutch prey When chasing their prey, a common mistake made by Expat women is to dress well. Expat women have also been known to visit hairdressers more than twice a year and they are also not strangers to wearing makeup. This can make the skittish and highly sensitive Dutchman extremely nervous. A well dressed woman with styled hair and makeup might be after the thing he values most, his money.
To stand a chance with a Dutchman, my advice is to take a flight to London. Find a homeless person that fits your size, and then pay them some money to hand over their jeans which should be in a pretty poor state. Turn all the lights off in your apartment, then reach for the first thing that comes out of the wardrobe. It will definitely not match the rest of the outfit. Take a salad strainer or colander, put this over your head and then turn on the tap dating etiquette in the netherlands 30 seconds.
Leave your hair wet, then put on a heavy metal song and shake your head in time to the selected track for another three minutes. This will make your hair fit the style typically worn by Dutch women, thus naturally attractive to Dutch men. Do not apply any makeup. Hairstyles of Dutch men The Dating etiquette in the netherlands is incredibly flat, thus it can be extremely windy here. The most common form of hairstyle for the Dutch male is a style that is aerodynamic and reacts well to the windy conditions of this country.
Dutch men typically have their hair combed backwards in the style of the Lion King. My advice is to not be surprised that most men have this hairstyle. Fashion Dutchmen and Brown Shoes go together like Drones and dead civilians, Amsterdam and high apartment rental costs and Miley Cyrus and bad taste.
I guarantee that on your first date with a Dutchmen the standard uniform of Brown Shoes, Blue Jeans, a smart shirt and a suit jacket will be worn. This is because like their female counterparts, Dutch men believe firmly in Dating etiquette in the netherlands Maar Normaal, i. The once proud Dutch lion will become a pussycat. Once you have a Dutchman he will expect you to bark orders at him like a circus trainer shouting at his animals. Flirting and romance The female friends of the Shallow Man inform me that your expectations in this regard should be lower than a snakes belly.
When absolutely desperate, we even date British girls, but the Dutch? Why are they so difficult? How do I succeed in the Dutch dating game with women? Every woman is different, so of course I will have to generalise. The tips I will provide are just ways of helping to at least get as far as a good conversation, or better still the things that expat men should not say to Dutch women.
Religion To get anywhere with a Dutch woman you have to be able to understand, respect and tolerate their primary religion which is smoking. Dutch women worship smoking above just about anything else. Take a wander through the Pijp or the nine streets on a freezing cold day, when even the Penguins are wearing Burberry scarves, hats and gloves. Stupid foreign rules are to be ignored, like red traffic lights when cycling. To get past the basic niceties of an introduction it will not help if you make comments about smoking being detrimental to their health, or commenting on why they are either in the freezing cold smoking, or asking them not to smoke inside a busy bar as there is a smoking ban.
Jeans Learn from my mistakes from the past. Never, even after a glass of champagne or four, make jokes about the tendency of Dutch women to wear jeans morning noon and night, at weddings, funerals, michelin star restaurants, exhibitions, art galleries, dating etiquette in the netherlands parties etc. This will get you instantly dismissed from any further conversation. Which translated means, do not dare to display any individuality at all. Be a clone, if the next 50 women are wearing jeans then so should you.
Equality and Dutch women Do not, under any circumstances bring up the subject of part time working. In Dutch society, dating etiquette in the netherlands lot of women dating etiquette in the netherlands that by not cutting their hair, shouting loudly, and acting aggressively, that this makes them liberated. In fact, financial independence is one of the strongest indicators of equality. The Dutch taxpayer including me pays a fortune every year for thousands of women to go to University and get a degree.
Often, women only work full-time for several years and then as soon as they find a man, go part-time, something which is allowed under Dutch employment law. How are your gaming experiences here in the Netherlands? Amsterdam Dating Dating Dutch Dating in the Netherlands dating tips Dutch Dating Game Dutch Fashion Dutch men Dutch oven Dutch women going dutch Shallowman tips for dating. Simon Woolcot is a privileged Expat who came to Amsterdam from London for a six month assignment and has remained for nine years.
Planning is obviously not his strong point.